I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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