I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize