I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
