Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
