My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
sex in a hospital.. check
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
