And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
