am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
