Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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