whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
