I need help removing her.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
