is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
