another moral hangover. fuck.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize