Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
