ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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