If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
