Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
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