She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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