We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
