So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
