i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
