we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
