this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
