I just saw a hot homeless man
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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