He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
