Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
