R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Randomize
