We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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