Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize