i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
