i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
