i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
