He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
