No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
