Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Randomize