we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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