I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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