I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize