oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
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