One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
