So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
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