You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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