i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
My dick has a subreddit
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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