omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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