that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Randomize