he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
