Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
