id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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