An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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