This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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