he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize